Let me not be blind with privilege...

Let me not be blind with privilege
Give me eyes to see the pain
Let the blessings you've poured out on me
Not be spent on me in vain
Let this life be used for the change
I will go............


Hello blogging world, for those that may not know my story I've started this blog because I feel that God has called me to move to China and work in an government orphanage with the beautiful children that live there. With over 600 orphaned children living in the orphanage where I will be living and working I often ask myself, what am I thinking? Why am I moving to a foreign country as a single 21 year old women? What could I offer these children that they truly need? Who am I to think that they even want my help or love? Who am I to try and make a difference for children half way across the world?

If you plan on following this blog let it be known now that I will always voice my doubts about my abilities, my strength and my knowledge.

But I will never doubt Gods call on my life to care for orphans.

When it comes to lives circumstances or trialing times in my life I have always had people telling me "God will never give you more than you can handle" and I've even found myself offering these same words of advice to people when they face trials in life. But it dawned on me while driving home from work this week that this statement could not be farther from the truth. While looking back on situations in my life it occurred to me that God had given me more than I could handle on several accounts. (religious people stay on board with me for just a minute, I promise I'm going somewhere with this) God had placed me in the middle of situations that I could not handle nor could I find my way out of. But in those circumstances and in those times of trial God always was there to handle those situations with me. He put me in situations where I had no other way out but to offer him the situation and let Him take control of it. Some of you might think when reading this....... she's lost her mind to serve a God that would do that to someone that He loves, or maybe others of you are knit-picking me to death finding all of the religious errors in the statement I made above. But looking back on those situations in my life I could not be more grateful for God forcing me with life situations that I could not handle. His grace and His love that He bestowed on me in those times in my life are more precious to me than gold. I believe that God will always give His children more than they can handle so that if we surrender everything to Him, He can reveal to us everything we need to know.

So I am not bilingual, I am not financially prepared, I do not have a counseling degree, I am by no means very knowledgeable on China or it's government. But I have seen the faces of it's orphans and although I have no special gifts or talents that would make me a perfect fit to be a role model or a friend to these children, God has called me to return and work amongst them for a year. And I could not be more thrilled about it. I have seen just a glimpse of Gods heart for the orphans of this world and I cannot wait to gain a greater understanding for Gods love for His orphaned children of the Republic of China.